Pitru Paksha

September 15, 2019

Baba ji's (Grandfather) Shraddha

Have you watched the movie 'Coco'? It was a beautiful movie. You probably know the Dia De Los Muertos or the 'Day of the Dead' from that. But do you know what 'Pitru-Paksha' is? 

In Sanskrit, Pitru (पितृ) means ‘father’ and Paksh (पक्ष) means ‘fortnight’ or a period of roughly 2 weeks of the lunar calendar. In Hinduism, during Pitru-Paksha gratitude is expressed towards one's ancestors in the form of prayers and food offerings. The ritual is called पितृ श्राद्ध - that which is done with श्रद्धा (faith). I know less about the pauranik katha and the rituals but the contributions of those ancestors to our moral, intellectual and spiritual life are worth remembering. It is the time devoted to remembering those and their gifts to us. Many are on my mind right now. Among those my grandparents have been the eldest, I have been with 3 of them and only seen the picture of the other. 

Sometimes I notice many similarities in my habits and that of my grandparents’. It could be genetic or likely childhood influence. I particularly saw my paternal grandmother (‘amma’) as a very self-reliant person who won’t take help from anyone unless needed. I saw her taking care of all her things (including washing all clothes etc.) herself even at that age regardless of how much we tried to convince her not to. I saw her as a woman who had lived in a conservative society yet became open-minded when needed and would silently appreciate everyone around her. I see the same person in me now and then. 

Memories with my paternal grandfather are a bit weak (I was 8yr old when he left) but the habits have come down. I saw a few of his diaries of daily expense log records. I found myself doing the same many times just because it helped me resolve my internal world. At that time I didn’t think about him but I think it was coming from there. He was the one who somehow transferred the skills of sewing in our family that I felt it's customary to have a sewing machine at home. His bravery was such that when a snake bit him, he didn’t bother to disturb others and did the first aid himself in the darkness of the night. 

My maternal grandmother was a pillar of strength. I wrote this small poem as a tribute to her when she left 3 years ago.

वर्ष २०१६ मौनी अमावस्या को

ले लिया तुमने मौन अनंत 

आज तुम्हारे जाने पर 

ये मन है थोड़ा खिन्न 

शब्दों में ही लिखकर 

अब करे याद ये तुमको। 

थी गहन आवाज़ तुम्हारी कितनी 

सबको करती अनुशासित

सब सोचे था वो कड़कपन 

पर हमने देखा चिंता और प्यार। 

केश तुम्हारे थे काले कितने 

वृद्धावस्था ने भी घुटने टेके थे 

सारे नाती पोते भी करते थे 

मन ही मन में गर्व उन पर। 

पूजा पाठ में ध्यान था कितना 

करतीं सबके सुख की कामना 

कितनी भी कठिनाई आयीं 

पर हार कभी ना तुमने मानी।

इस जीवन में तुम अपने 

काम अनेक कर गयीं 

मुझको तो बड़े उपहार में 

माँ तुम मेरी दे गयीं।

पर अपने ही हंसालय से

तुम आज विदा क्यों ले गयीं?

Such is the legacy of these ancestors that I am not sure if we can ever compare to them. The little glimpse of them that I see in myself will forever be treasured!